inbox

[mykidisthebest]

Action | Text Astral Projection | Other

Comments

Re: probably night 62

[mykidisthebest]

[Charon????]

Pretty much. I also don't want everyone being Awakened to cause more problems in the pasture, which it might. Our abilities are already dampened so I don't know if it would make a huge difference.

[sighs, soft and tired]

I'm just trying to think of something that would help.

Re: probably night 62

[endsjustified]

[he's considered himself different from other people all his life ok. maybe not in as literal a way as Lethe means here but.

smooths a hand over the back of Lethe's head, down his nape and shoulder]

I was considering. Coming back around to asking you.

Re: probably night 62

[mykidisthebest]

[Charon can feel Lethe's surprise, spine straightening as he sits up a little more]

Wh--Really? What made you think about it?

Re: probably night 62

[endsjustified]

. . .

The prospect of longevity becomes much less horrifying, when one finds themselves in a situation with near-endless prospects, and everything to live for.

I still want to die, of course. But perhaps it would be good to not simply resign myself to the constraints that I was born with. If the circumstances have changed for the better, I would like . . . to change with them.

Re: probably night 62

[mykidisthebest]

...Is that the only reason?

Re: probably night 62

[endsjustified]

[he takes on the very distinct air of a cat who's been caught in the act of eating the ham sandwich you left on the counter and is now making direct eye contact while it decides what to do]

. . .

Re: probably night 62

[mykidisthebest]

[makes direct eye contact and waits to see if Charon is going to say something first or if he has to]

. . .

Re: probably night 62

[endsjustified]

[stares down at Lethe's face, then looks away for a moment to dispel the tension, taking a deep breath]

. . . I don't want to die before the people I care about. And you're all--

Re: probably night 62

[mykidisthebest]

[flinches guiltily oops oops oops]

My lifespan is--normal.

Re: probably night 62

[endsjustified]

But Yoohyun's isn't, is it?

Re: probably night 62

[mykidisthebest]

In theory. He has a long lifespan. But he won't live that long.

Re: probably night 62

[endsjustified]

...why not?

Re: probably night 62

[mykidisthebest]

He won't live without me. He's said as much before.

[there's an undertone of exasperation to it]

It might sound dramatic coming from anyone but him. So I'd like to find a way to live at least...a hundred years would be okay. I don't want his life cut short because of me.

Re: probably night 62

[endsjustified]

There you go, then.

If the road is there, or can be made, don't expect me not to pursue.

Re: probably night 62

[mykidisthebest]

[huffs, quietly]

Stubborn. Can I tell you a secret?

Re: probably night 62

[endsjustified]

Always.

[it's a response to both those things, really]

Re: probably night 62

[mykidisthebest]

I'd like you to live for a long, long time. As long as you can. Even though you're saying the same thing right now, it's just because you have a reason for doing so. You want to live long so that the people you care about won't be lonely, right? My reasons aren't that strong by a long shot. I love you. So I want you to live, and I don't want you to die. That's all there is to it.

It's always your choice in the end. But if you want to live, I'll do everything in my power to make it happen.

Re: probably night 62

[endsjustified]

[MAKES A TINY NOISE LIKE HE'S BEEN PUNCHED]

Re: probably night 62

[mykidisthebest]

[is that a good noise or a bad noise. he doesn't know.]

You can pretend I didn't say anything if that's easier.

Re: probably night 62

[endsjustified]

...you know I can't do that.

Re: probably night 62

[mykidisthebest]

I'm giving you the option anyways. Who knows, this might be the first time you decide you don't want to know something.

Re: probably night 62

[endsjustified]

That wouldn't be fair to you.

...

You're an extaordinary person, Lethe, no matter how much you paint yourself otherwise.

Re: probably night 62

[mykidisthebest]

It wasn't fair of me to spring that on you either. So we'd be even.

[ugh that gets a smile out of him though]

That's high praise coming from you.

Re: probably night 62

[endsjustified]

[leans down and over a bit, brushing Lethe's hair from his brow with his hand so he can kiss it]

You give your heart, easy and open, and you mean it. That's rare.

I don't know when I'll be able to answer that...but I'll answer you someday soon, if that's all right. I beg your patience.

Re: probably night 62

[mykidisthebest]

You don't have to--don't feel pressured. I mean it. Seriously. I didn't say it because I was expecting a reply. It was relevant to the topic, that's all. I know it's been...messy for you lately. The last thing I want to do is add to that.